Review: Paladin Pleasure Sculptors Mars

Mars is a textured, non-realistic fantasy dildo made by Paladin Pleasure Sculptors. It was my first introduction to fantasy toys, and is still one of the prettiest toys I’ve owned to date.

Paladin Pleasure Sculptors is an indie fantasy toy shop that’s owned & operated by a husband and wife team in Texas. All of their toys made from body safe silicone and poured by hand, making them one of a kind. The phrase “silicone sculpture” is jokingly used as a euphemism within the fantasy dildo community, but PPS makes toys that can only be described as works of art.

Design

Fantasy dildos often feature abstract patterns and stunning colorways, and Mars is no exception. I purchased it in a coloration called Neon Mess, which reminds me of a galaxy with rainbow ribbons inside. The pour on my toy consists of mostly purple and blue undertones, with a touch of dark pink and greenish hues. There are incredibly detailed ribbons of fluorescent rainbows scattered throughout, which are UV reactive when placed under a blacklight. Thanks to some special body safe silicone pigments, Mars also glows in the dark. Regular sex toys are cool, but ones that also double as nightlights? Amazing.

Materials and Care

My Mars is in shore 0050 silicone, which is a medium firmness. The squish level feels similar to the firmness of my inner palm if I press my fourth finger to my thumb. Paladin Pleasure Sculptors‘ medium silicone has a satin finish that strikes a balance between matte and glossy silicone.^[1]While matte silicone tends to be more draggy, glossy silicone is often super slippery.

Because silicone is a body-safe and non-porous material, Mars is fully sterilizable. I like to boil my silicone toys in hot water for 5 minutes to sterilize them before first use, and then every 4-6 weeks or so after that. Although platinum silicone can also be sterilized in a 10:1 bleach and water solution, I usually opt for boiling as it’s harder to mess up. For everyday purposes, I use fragrance-free soap and water to wash Mars. I have a designated dildo toothbrush set aside for highly textured toys like this, and I like to give it a good scrub to make sure it’s fully clean.^[2]Before someone asks: That brush is for sex toy cleaning purposes only, and has never been in my mouth. It’s only weird if you make it weird, okay?

Specs

The Paladin Pleasure Sculptors Mars is sold in 4 sizes: mini, small, medium and large. Although my Mars is a small, its size is still above average by non-fantasy dildo standards. This toy has a wide, flared base, making it safe for anal use.

Small Mars Measurements:

• Total length: 5″
• Insertable length: 4.25″
• Maximum diameter: 2.3″
• Minimum diameter: 1.67″

Not going to lie, I was both thrilled and terrified by Mars’ size upon arrival – this toy is an absolute CHONK of silicone. I have yet to reach size royalty status,^[3]Despite my best efforts! but I was determined. 

This dildo is definitely not a quickie toy for me. I usually need to warm up with a couple of other toys, some g-spot orgasms and a lot of lube in order to use Mars comfortably. Since it’s made from silicone, I recommend using either water-based or oil-based lube with this dildo.

Accessibility

I’ll occasionally set this toy on a chair and slowly lower myself onto it. Although Mars doesn’t have a suction cup, the large base is heavy enough that it stays in place while I grind against it. I don’t think it would stay put during more vigorous riding, but that’s not something I can do with this toy.

While the base size makes Mars great for grinding against, it also takes up a lot of genital real estate. This can make it tricky if I want to use a vibrator for external stimulation. I’ve tried wedging my Magic Wand between my dick and the dildo base, which always feels like a game of sex toy tetris. It’s slightly less awkward with my Chaiamo bullet vibe, but not by much. Due to the base shape, I have to hold vibrators at a weird-ass angle, which usually leads to some gnarly hand and wrist cramps later.  

My Experience

Mars has a strongly defined head that delivers a nice popping sensation upon entry. It was slightly uncomfortable the first couple of times I used this dildo, but the feeling has grown on me. These days, I find that “pop” so satisfying! I’ll often take a few minutes just to play with the coronal ridge, sliding it in and out until I feel ready to take the rest of the toy. 

Abruptly beneath the tip, the shaft swells to its widest point. This knot is where Mars’ texture feels the most prominent, sometimes to an overwhelming extent. The sensation of those bumps pressing against my front wall of my cunt, combined with the intense feeling of fullness, are often enough to make me come without much conscious effort. 

Because of how textured Mars is, thrusting can quickly become overstimulating. Instead, I like to twist it back and forth very slightly, or just clench around it. While the texture and girth are intense, this toy doesn’t provide much targeted g-spot stimulation.

Overall

Mars is more than a fantasy dildo; it’s an experience. It’s not a toy that I reach for super often, but Mars is one of my top picks for when I’m craving a challenge or more intense sensations.

If you’re texture and girth without added length, the Paladin Pleasure Sculptors Mars might be a good fit for you! This is not what I would consider a beginner-friendly toy,^[4]Especially in medium firmness, where the silicone doesn’t have as much give. but your mileage may vary.

While I would definitely purchase this toy again, I think that a mini size/soft firmness Mars would be a better fit for me. Size royalty or not, my body has limits that can only be pushed so far.

You can buy Mars from Paladin Pleasure Sculptors‘ inventory.

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I bought this toy with my own money, and was not compensated in the form of cash or a free toy.

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